I'm ALIVE

First off, I apologize for not posting a blog entry for the last week. I have really missed writing the posts, but I honestly haven't had the time or energy to write even though I have so much to tell you, since, as you know, the drama in my life never ends, haha. Let me give you a quick recap of the various aspects of my life:

1. Food. It was doing really well until this weekend when I decided to throw my diet out the window and drink/ eat just as much as I wanted to. On Friday night, I consumed nearly an entire liter of vodka with my friend Josh and his girlfriend Brandi. I bought this fizzy pink gingerale mixer and you couldn't taste the alcohol at all, which is a bit scary. And then on Saturday I ended up at a house party where I won at beer pong for the first time EVER (haha!) and managed to drink several cups of a mysterious punch mixture, which supposedly had Everclear in it...This lead to me dancing alone at 4am in front of a bunch of random people, haha. And then on Sunday, in my hungover state, I was craving burgers and fries and a strawberry milkshake and I ate it all. The upshot of this rant is to confess that when I stepped on the scale this morning, it was back up to 174, ugh...

2. Exercise. Really bad. Unless you count my walks to 7-eleven or the bars in my neighborhood (3 block in total).

3. Guys. I've decided that I'm going to take everyone's advice and stay single for a while. Of course, this doesn't guarantee (in the slightest) that I'm going to actually follow my own advice. At the moment, I'm still kind of dating E, and I met some interesting guys at the party on Saturday...haha...On the good news side, I finally got a backbone when it comes to my ex, N, and I told him that I was done with our horrible yo-yo dating cycle.

4. Money. Well, this has seriously been stressing me out, but I am proud to say that I've created a budget that will hopefully have me caught up on everything by April 15. Unfortunately, my budget is going to be extremely tight until then, and I'm not going to have much spare money for anything. Basically, I'm going to have $200 every two weeks for food, gas, and any other extras. Ugh...On the other hand, it's a weight off my mind to know that I CAN do this.

Well, that's about it. Now that you're all caught up in the boring details of my life, I feel like I can finally get into what I really want to talk about--the double standard between men and women concering sex. I know that many a female rock song has addressed this issue, but I feel like if Kelly Clarkson can do it, so can I.

Here's the deal: I am so sick of the fact that society judges rambunctious/ flirty women as "sluts," while men can do the exact same thing and be thought of as even more desirable. Characters like Don Draper in Mad Men, who cheat on their wives and spend their evenings seducing attractive younger women, are seen as mysterious and sexy. Whereas, women, in our society, lose value for having a reputation for hooking up with men, even if they do much less "slutty" things, like getting drunk at a party and making out with two guys. To make matters worse, people often lie or exaggerate about stuff like this. And since women are so vulnerable to being called "sluts," it's easy to believe the other party when it's just her word against his.

This is all to say, that an ex-boyfriend, N, who has mistreated me consistently for the last few months had the nerve to justify his poor behavior because of the fact that he heard a rumor about me and one of his friends. In a nutshell, he heard that I hooked up with one of his friends after we broke up. Despite the fact that the rumor wasn't true AND the fact that even if the rumor was true, it was still none of his business, he decided that I wasn't a valuable person because of it. Despite the fact that he was also hooking up with other people and that he possibly cheated on his GF (who I didn't know about) when he hooked up with me on Tuesday night. Grrr...this really pisses me off. So I finally snapped and dished out a bit of Katie anger, which I'd been holding back for some time. I told him if thinking I was a slut helped him to feel better about himself (and his shitty behavior) so be it. And I FINALLY told him I never wanted to see him again.

And that, my friends, is the end of the story with N. Thank goodness. I'm sorry to say that at this point, after all this drama, my good memories of being with him have soured. But such is life. Maybe at some point I'll be able to think of him without cringing...maybe...

Anyway, I've got to get on with my day. I'll try to post more consistently this week!