Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Bloated Whale

Hello everyone. I've returned from my trip! This is a picture I took with my phone of Sanibel Island at dusk. It doesn't really capture how beautiful it was on the island because I took the picture with my phone, but it does give you a sense of the place.

Sooo...it's been difficult to get back to the blog since I returned on Sunday, because I feel like a huge hypocrite writing a health blog, as I stuff my face with chocolate chip cookies and whatever else I can get my hands on. But here's the truth--I'm not perfect. And right now I've completely lost my mind and have been eating terrible food for the past few weeks and barely exercising at all because I feel like a bloated whale. And honestly all the junk food and excessive eating makes me feel UNWELL and unfit to exercise.

Let me try to explain what happened. Prior to the trip, I was struggling with controlling my bad food cravings and feeling pretty low energy due to the short days, stress at work, etc. Then I went on the trip and I gave myself a free pass to eat everything I wanted in whatever quantity I wanted. Of course, I still felt guilty after I would eat past a level of contentment, but then I'd wake up starving and the cycle would repeat the next day. In some ways, this put a bit of a damper on my otherwise perfect trip.

And then I got home from the trip feeling bloated and gross and what do you think I did? I baked a batch of chocolate chip cookies (my specialty) and consumed the entire thing while watching a season of Gray's Anatomy. Of course, I mixed the food up with macaroni and cheese, microwave pizza, and bagels with cream cheese. By the way, the sixth season of Gray's Anatomy is pretty engaging, if you ask me.

So, this is the deal. I feel like I gained 100 pounds and I don't feel attractive at all. Which is making me want to hide from everyone I know, especially the numerous ex-boyfriends who live in a one mile radius from my house. My face is also breaking out due to all the gross food I've been eating. Yes, I am feeling sorry for myself--I'll admit it. And what does this feeling lead to...more cookies and more Gray's Anatomy. Bad, bad!

Okay, what would the former Katie do in this situation? I know that 2.5 weeks of bad eating will not ruin my weight loss journey and that I need to get back on track asap. At the moments, my pants still fit despite the bloat and I can still button my shirts. I have not gained 60 pounds in the past few weeks and I am not back to where I started. Now, on the other hand, if I continue to delay, it's very likely that I will regain the weight I lost and maybe even more. I don't want to be that nonathletic, seriously overweight person ever again.

So now is the time. It's time to clean out the kitchen, buy healthy foods, weigh in, start exercising, and jump on the bandwagon again.

But I think I'll start tomorrow after I enjoy my last meal of macaroni and cheese and peanut m&ms. Wish me luck =)

2 comments:

  1. I think you have to do what you have to do Katie, and if one "last meal" helps you get it all out of your system, so be it.

    A lot of people couldn't understand why I rejoined WW after I already lost so much weight, but for me - I need it. I need the accountability. I need the system to keep track. I need the meetings for when I have a bad day/week/month. This is YOUR journey, and only yours. You get to make all the calls.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I've been there more times than I could count! There is always that epiphany moment where you just decide that enough is enough with the bad eating and you just make the choice to start eating healthy again. You know this already, but I'll remind you that you'll start feeling well enough to get to the gym after a few days of eating healthy foods! What's helped me this past week (I ate horribly for just two days, but bad enough that my body just felt "off") was that I've been limiting my starchy carb intake (bread, pasta, rice, etc) to only one time a day and eating lean protein and fresh fruit/veggies with the healthy oils and the multivitamins and I feel great again! I may even be able to salvage those 2 days enough to LOSE this week.

    Are you going to WI tomorrow?

    ReplyDelete